January 11, 2019 - Can you hear the beating of my oh so amorous heart…

Well I guess it was around a year ago that I spoke a little about love. Now I can finally write about what it’s like to be in love. Yes my little heart has been taken by a great guy. His name’s Kevin and we met through a dating site. I think I mentioned a little about that in my last post. I had a lot of responses but only one caught my attention. When I say caught my attention I mean he’s just knocking me off my feet. Ya’, it’s really like that.

I need to regress a moment for the sake of my friends, please be patient, everyone knows I talk too much – way too much. But this needs more than just a casual mention

But yes, Jamie’s in love…

I have to say this because my close friends know what my attitude has been for some time now. I’ve often been heard to say, “This kitty don’t do well on a leash…” meaning of course I do as I please, I like my wine, weed, and freedom – just like any cat, or should I say, “A chick with trans-feline dysphoria”. I have so many cat like expressions to this little bundle of neurosis I call me. Like any cat I’ve hopped into a few people’s laps and just purred away, but the first ball of string I’d see would make me forget all about that. But also in the mode of a true feline, sometimes one will come along and I have an instant and permanent attachment. Well that’s exactly what happened when I met Kevin. I don’t mean to sound aloof as cats are so often seen. I’m just good inside myself and that was enough. Oh my, how quickly things can change.

Why am I like this? I don’t know. I like to say it’s the hormones but I tend to be kind of weird even without them. Maybe it’s because my poor little head has been banged around too much, I mean after all, I’ve had my head beaten against the hood of a car (by a couple of big bullies), It’s been split open with a brick (that was just another loving abuser), I’ve gone head first into a brick wall after falling down a flight of stairs (my own fault here – I was quite intoxicated), that's just to name a few but enough for now. Perhaps it’s roots go down to that place of my peculiar fascination with death which manifests in my fantasy of standing in complete darkness on the edge of a high tall cliff imagining what the fall would be like - how exciting that last crazy ride would be. Whatever the cause, I know I’m weird but I do like being me so there you have it.

So now, Jamie’s in love…

It’s funny how we can be so content without any expectation of change. Even my roommates (the people that own the house I rent a room in) started asking me why I don’t settle down with someone, why I didn’t even date any more. Well when you’re happy within yourself a couple of things can happen. First you can be very content all alone writing blogs, books, and articles for church newsletters. Another thing that can happen is someone comes along and because you have this inner spiritual happiness you are now ready to open your heart if the right person does happen to come along.

So along comes Kevin…

Perhaps I should apologize for carrying on the way I do, but once again, everyone that knows me will understand that I don’t take apologies lightly. If I apologize for something it’s because I’m sincerely sorry and am going to change whatever I’ve been doing that requires an apology. You see, so many people just apologize to get themselves off the hook somehow. Somehow just saying you’re sorry makes it all okay and the bad behavior continues. I won’t do that. So with that in mind I give no apology for my carrying on here. I’m in love and it feels good.

Well I guess that’s it for today, but please be sure to have a look at our pic below.

And as always, from the spiritual hippie chick...

Big hugs and blessings to all.