Today turned out to be a rather pleasant but quiet kind of day. I began with Sunday service at my regular place of worship, UCC - Simi Valley. "open and affirming" are typically used to describe our church/congregation and it certainly is - not just in the gender issues but for people in general. I really love my church and the people in it.
I was again asked about which pronouns I prefer. Do you have any idea what a big deal this is to me. Many folks out there that define as transgender, and some of the other nontraditional gender definitions, get pretty intense and even downright hostile over this subject. Of course there's many on the other side of the fence that refuse to comply or maliciously mock those from the the alternative perspective. The fact is that I consider myself fortunate to have people approach me to ask which I prefer. My big sister has also asked what my preference is. This really makes me feel good. It is so considerate and affirming.
Well my response is that I do prefer the feminine but since I'm early on in this period of hormone replacement therapy (hrt) it's okay for them to use whatever it is they're comfortable with. I am beginning to show the effects of hrt and with a little makeup and more feminine clothes I'm starting to feel so much more like myself again, that is as a woman. I also want to acknowledge that this is a transition for all of us. It's a new dance with steps we all need to learn and to become comfortable with it while just allowing it to become natural. I feel so much better as a girl and truly appreciate the effort they're making. I want to make it as simple as possible for all of us. But the fact is, I really like when people refer to me as she, her, etc.
Another wonderful thing has recently happened at our church. A week or two ago the women's group changed the wording that defines who the group is for, it's now for anyone who feels or defines themselves as a woman. They came to me right after the wording was changed and invited me to begin attending. I understand that they made this change with me in mind, it almost made me cry. It feels so nice to have them accept me as one of the group. Yesterday was my first time in the group. All are friends and some I'm much closer to. Joy and I have been friends for a while now as we share some mutual interests so we do things together outside of the standard church activities. Joan has been taking care of the community garden since it began and along with her husband John, and also Calvin, started the garden.Working with her is fun so we are becoming much closer. Of course Jeanne and I have been hanging out for a while just doing things that friends do. This all feels so good.
I don't want to leave the guys out. They have been really great too. I can talk with them as friends like any girl would with her male friends. Of course there's things I'll only talk with other girls about but I do like having guy friends too. Guys can really be funny and they do have a way of seeing things that's different from a girl. I suppose that I have a rather unique perspective since even though I've always felt and seen myself as female I have had something of a male experience (it feels weird just to say that) and understand some things they go through better than other girls would. It seems that while of course women have many social issues to deal with, all too often the problems and challenges men face are overlooked. Men deserve consideration too. Something I like about being female is the chance to be nurturing to a guy, not romantically, just as a soft and caring person.
Well it's a little past 9:00 in the evening and I need some dinner. I guess I've described today pretty well. There's more but this is the important stuff.
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