Friday September 22, 2017

 

Yes, This is me - Jamie. Just thought I'd share.

It's been a while hasn't it? Yes, as usual I've been been busy busy busy. I have a little something to share today. Just another one of those,"The way I see things." Anyhow...

I’ve been trying to make sense of some things for so many years and I do believe something of an answer has finally presented itself. Those of you that have read my book will understand better, if you haven’t, I think it will still make sense on some level. Let me give it a try…

I imagined myself to be a butterfly, fluttering along on a beautiful day, following my course, following my heart. I suddenly had to decide, for just a moment, whether to continue to follow my heart or to be what I thought was responsible (I swear, I can be as dumb as a rock sometimes). I chose to be responsible and made a slight turn. A few days later I heard about a big big storm whose path had altered, only slightly, but altered because of the flapping of my wings when I chose not to follow my heart. A tiny edge of this storm touched in a location that would have otherwise been avoided had I stayed on my path - following my heart. The result of this tiny deviation had an unforeseeable consequence – a consequence so ghastly, so awful, it never would’ve even entered my mind. Someone I cared so deeply for was taken from me, taken from this life in the most awful way. “It’s not your fault, you can’t blame yourself” they said. I already knew that. To make matters worse, this same chain of events occurred a second time and because of my decision, someone else I cared deeply for was taken from this life. I want to add that I myself have avoided similar consequences that only by what I see as divine intervention, am I here to tell this story (this divine intervention has happened for me more than once, I only wrote about the most dramatic in my book).

So why am I still here but those very special others aren’t?

I don’t know.

The point is, the answer that finally presented itself is that while I know that what ultimately happened is not my fault – I didn’t cause the storms, I also know that I played a decisive role in the events that played themselves out. No, it’s not a burden of guilt that I carry, no, it’s a heart that’s been shattered in ways I can’t begin to describe. I really am a very happy person by nature. I guess we all have our moments.

Monday September 4, 2017 - Memorial Day

Happy Memorial Day All. There's so much going on in the world, President Donald Trump said this, someone said that about Barrack Obama, Hurricane Harvey was terrible, North Korea is doing stuff, Climate Change, Global Warming, and blah blah blah. That's all very interesting but is not the topic here, well not today anyhow. I'm just hoping to share perspectives with others, and like my book, it happens to be the world or life the way it appears to me.

It’s been a few days. How about we catch up...

I’ve been having a good time today, haven’t done a lot, but it’s been fun. I started the day by going to Target to get some shopping done and to give my friend Curtis a ride home from work, work for Curtis happens to be Target. I always have such a good time with him, I don’t think I’ve ever known anyone that could make me laugh so much. Somehow something as simple as a short shopping trip becomes an adventure. Actually Target is just his part-time job, well one of them, he’s also a minister (almost) at our church UCC – Simi Valley, and a full time student studying theology and graduating soon. He used to be a standup comic so you can imagine his sermons – you should stop in some Sunday morning and see what I mean. UCC – Simi Valley is a really different kind of church.

We haven’t been doing much work in the garden recently, we being my friend Joan and I. It’s just been so brutally hot! The season is sadly almost over, the crops are waning, and the heat only made things worse. I did the announcement during the service Sunday telling everyone that we have veggies for sale. I enjoy doing that. My little commercial went something like this:

“Well everyone you know its September and winter is almost here. Soon we won’t have any veggies for sale – for a while anyhow. So remember the story of the industrious little ant that worked hard all summer stocking up on UCC veggies and preparing for winter. Well the cold winter winds began to blow one day and the grasshopper that had been playing his fiddle all summer and just enjoying the sun found himself cold and hungry unprepared for winter. Mr. Grasshopper went to Mr. Ant’s house and pleaded, ‘Please Mr. Ant, I’m so cold and hungry, won’t you please help me?’ Now Mr. Ant was in a very good mood with his tummy full of UCC’s fine veggies and he decided to let Mr. Grasshopper in to have something to eat. They got along so well that they fell in love, got married, and lived happily ever after. Find out how UCC veggies can change your life too, on sale in the kitchen after today’s service for a donation of whatever you see fit.”

Well they seemed to like it. I like to take traditional stories and put my own spin on them to share the way I see things. I love my little church and all the people there, we really are a bit different when it comes to churches. I suppose I’m a bit different when it comes to people, or so I’m told.

We had Game Night and campfire on Saturday. The games were fun. We didn’t have a campfire though – it was just so hot! We stayed inside and played our games until around nine. Usually the campfire lasts until around ten. Everyone was having a good time. I had a great time.

Tomorrow morning its back to the garden with Joan - lots of weeds that need pulling. I hope everyone is having a nice holiday.